How do I ask for help?

I have observed many clients with childhood trauma who struggle to ask for help.

They will report struggling to get work done at home without help and feeling resentful that no one notices they need help.

Do you experience that?

Other people may ask you why you don’t just ask for help.

There is a very good reason for that.

The abused child is a child who is often alone.

The child is without help.

Requests for help are often met with either anger or shaming.

The child learns they cannot ask for help.

The child grows up and still believes it is not possible to ask for help.

I could tell you to just ask for help.

Maybe you could do that.

Maybe you would struggle.

You would feel your heart racing.

You would feel panic.

You would have a sense of being in danger.

Your childhood when these neural pathways were laid down has taught you that.

It takes a lot of exploring feelings and healing before you can learn that you can ask for help and receive it.

As you heal you can learn that you have the right to ask for help.

You can learn that you deserve help when you ask for it.

You can learn that healthy people are more than happy to help when asked.

Think about the wonderful day when you find yourself in need of help and ask.

And when you ask, you receive the help you needed.

If you would like to talk to me about how I can help you with learning it is okay to ask for help, please contact me on 0409396608 or

If you would like to learn more, I write a regular newsletter with interesting information, tips, information on courses, and the occasional freebie. At the moment I have a free mindfulness meditation for anyone who signs up to my newsletter. This meditation offers a way to safely explore your feelings and learn to be okay with them. If you would like to subscribe please click on the link here:

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