The individuality of grief

I often have clients tell me they want to find people who have suffered the same loss so someone can understand them. But the truth is you will never find someone who is grieving the same way you are. You are an individual. The person you have lost is an individual. The relationship you had with the one you have lost is individual. Your experience in unique.
Finding another person with the same type of loss is not going to help. There may be similarities but there will always be differences. There is also the danger you may both want to tell your stories and the other person may not necessarily hear your story.
This is not to say that people in grief shouldn’t talk to other people in grief. It can be very helpful to share with others. Just don’t expect the other person/people will meet the needs you want met. If you expect them to solve all your grieving problems, you will be disappointed.
Grieving is hard. Unbelievably hard. It is also a lonely path. You can reach out to others occasionally to share the common ground, but you will never find someone who experiences your grief in an identical way.
So draw comfort from fellow travellers and know that there will always be parts of your experience that are unique.