So many people who have experienced trauma in life live with the sense of terrible brokenness.
There is the sense that “I am defective”. And so much in your life has told you that.
There is a terrible sense of shame that these things have been done to you.
The Untrue Messages That Dominate Your Life
But those messages and the other negative ones you received are not true. They are the words of the people who traumatised you. If they were dysfunctional enough to traumatise you, then they were too dysfunctional to give you accurate information about yourself.
For many of you, you may be aware of this but are unable to turn off the negative messages in your head.
People Rise Above Childhood Trauma Better Than You Think
Over my life I have read and heard so many people’s stories. Many of them speak of surviving trauma to arrive at the point in their lives where they could share their story.
One thing that emerges from the story is the way they survived.
Some people are fully aware they have achieved a lot and want to share that heartening news.
Do You See Your Strengths Or Your Failings?
Other people are not aware. They may come into my room feeling such a failure, when they have achieved amazing things to just get to my door.
Maybe you are one of those people who sees only the negative and defective and can’t see the truth, that despite the horrible things that have happened to you in life, you are an amazing and unique individual.
Maybe you think that seems insincere. You don’t want to be told by me that you are amazing and unique.
Looking At Your Trauma From A Different Perspective
But what if, instead of seeing the awful things that have happened in your life you saw instead how they have contributed to you being an amazing unique individual.
What if you could see the way you have survived as being a triumph and instead of seeing the defective you see the triumphant you.
The Reality Of You, Here, Now
The reality is you are still here and you are living your life. You might not live it as well as you want to. You might not feel totally in control of your reactions. Those are things you can work on. But the fact that you are here and functioning is testimony to the way you had strengths and abilities that allowed you to function despite the things that have happened to you in the past. And just maybe those things that happened have given you strengths and abilities other people don’t have.
What Might Those Abilities Be?
There is the obvious one about your brain developing more in some areas that often means you are better at reading non-verbal communication than others and are better at spotting danger.
But there are other areas too.
Maybe you are more understanding of others.
Maybe you are more compassionate.
Maybe you have a drive to seek justice for others.
Maybe you believe in honouring your word so that you are reliable and admired for that.
Maybe you have tenacity in difficult situations that allows you to keep going when others give up.
Maybe You Need Help To Heal And See Your Strengths And Abilities
Maybe you can see these things but then that belief in yourself is blown away by all the negative messages in your head.
Sometimes you need assistance to heal. You need assistance to see the real you.
This is where a trauma qualified counsellor can assist you.
Can I Help?
If you would like to talk to me about how I can help you with your healing and identification of your amazing strengths, please contact me on 0409396608 or nan@plentifullifecounselling.com.au
If you would like to learn more, I write a regular newsletter with helpful information, tips, information on courses, and the occasional freebie. At the moment I have a free mindfulness meditation for anyone who signs up to my newsletter. This meditation offers a way to safely explore your feelings and learn to be okay with them. If you would like to subscribe please click on the link here: http://eepurl.com/g8Jpiz