• Are you finding yourself bored with your life?
• Maybe you feel depressed at how little you feel you achieve?
• Or do you think that compared to other people you life is so unimpressive?
• What can you do to fall in love with your life again?
• What can you do to feel motivated to change?
DO YOU REALLY KNOW YOURSELF?
The first thing is to ask yourself if you really know yourself. This may sound weird but let me explain.
You are a unique individual. At your core, the bit others often don’t see, is a vibrant, curious person. This person is magical and able to express themself in honesty and love. In fact this person is totally lovable.
Sometimes this authentic self is called the Wonder Child. The pure little being born into this world to thrive, survive and achieve as themself.
Life however rarely allows the Wonder Child to be themself. The Wonder Child is bruised and battered by people and events in life.
To protect themself, the Wonder Child hides the parts that they feel are unacceptable to others. This self protection keeps them away from true connection with others through their Authentic Self.
THE WOUNDED CHILD
As the Authentic Self is buried under these layers of protection, what emerges is the Wounded Child.
The Wounded Child knows they must put on a false self to protect themself from hurt and rejection. This becomes a Mask and it is designed to protect from hurt and rejection.
The trouble is that the Mask hides the true Authentic Self. Often you don’t even see the Mask as not being you and you miss out on knowing your Authentic Self.
So you live your life with the Mask that your Wounded Child hides behind as it protects your Authentic Self.
Small wonder you feel bored, depressed and that your lie is completely unimpressive.
WHAT CAN YOU DO ABOUT YOUR INAUTHENTIC LIFE?
How can you access your Authentic Self in order to change your life?
Sitting and thinking about it does little to help you. That Mask is very good at covering up those bits that are considered less socially acceptable.
There is a need for much deeper exploration of the unconscious in order to find that Authentic Self again.
HERE IS SOMETHING LEFT FIELD TO TRY
One of the things I encourage people to do is use art to express themselves.
What do I mean by art?
Anything that is spontaneous, creative and allows you to express your authentic self.
This can include:
• Journaling in a dedicated journal
• Drawing in an art journal
• Painting
• Collage
HOW DO I USE CREATIVITY TO FIND THE REAL ME?
The best way to find your authentic self and start the process of change is to spend a few minutes every day doing something spontaneous and creative.
I have already mentioned 4 things you can try but what you do depends on you.
The important thing is to let go and let the real you out to create.
JOURNAL WITH YOUR NON DOMINANT HAND
If you choose to write in a journal, write with your non dominant hand. This will allow you to access more of your mind that writing with your dominant hand.
DRAW OR PAINT
Drawing or painting can be great. Many people particularly love the flow of paint. My personal preference is for watercolour, but sometimes I draw with pencil, crayon or felt tip pens.
A lot of people are frightened of drawing/painting because they feel they can’t draw well. I draw stick figures, unashamedly. This is not about producing a masterpiece; it is about expressing yourself. Squiggles of paint, funny shapes, dots, lines. All these are great ways to express yourself. You need to paint what is inside, for your eyes only.
COLLAGE
If you feel really challenged by drawing or painting then you can try collage. Many people find that really helpful. You just need some magazines/advertising flyers, stickers, scraps of paper. Anything you can find that you can glue to a piece of paper is great.
A 30 DAY CREATIVITY CHALLENGE
One way to challenge yourself is to do this for 30 days. It need only take a few minutes.
• To do this effectively start by bringing yourself to a place of stillness.
• Sit quietly, you can close your eyes or let your eyes not focus on anything.
• As you sit quietly tell yourself you are going to let go of everything in your life at the moment. You could say “Just for this moment I let go of everything”
• Breathe in and out gently. Focus on your breath. After a few breaths take a deep breath into your belly and then gently let it out. Now breathe a few more deep breaths. Continue to focus on your breath. If anything comes into your mind just gently put it to one side. Don’t engage with the thought. Once you have taken a few breaths and you are feeling you have stilled your mind you can move on to the next step.
• While you are still quite and reflective, ask yourself “What do I need to paint/write/draw/collage right now?”
• You could put your hands on the paper and ask the question. You can tell yourself that you are going to express what needs to be expressed.
• Now start. Just put on that paper what feels you feel like. Don’t have a plan. If you feel you want to paint a corner red then paint it red. If you feel you want to draw a smiley face, then draw a smiley face. If you see a picture of a bottle of perfume and you want it on your page, then put it on your page. If you want to write random words in your journal then do that.
• Whatever you put on the paper is the right thing.
• Keep going until you feel you are finished.
• Look at what you have done.
• Does anything about it strike you in some way? It doesn’t have to.
• It is always helpful to put the paper away and look at it later.
• Things you put on the paper that may immediately or over time give you insights.
• You may notice you keep drawing a particular shape, or use certain words. You may find your collages follow a particular theme. You may favour certain colours.
• You may find you look at what you have done and a thought will pop into your head about it. You may find yourself seeing a meaning in the picture.
• Over time you may find more insights in your expression than you realised when you were doing it.
• There is no right and wrong in this.
If you would like to join my Plentiful Life Exploration Facebook group you are welcome to join in a 30 day challenge of expressing yourself daily.
The link for the group is Plentiful Life Exploration | Facebook
I will be kicking the 30 day challenge off next Tuesday 16 August at 4am with a live feed on my Facebook page. You are welcome to join me for that or you can watch it later.
You can post your work on the page and share any insights you have or ask people about any insights they may have in it.
NEED MORE HELP?
If you would like to talk to me about how I can help you find and heal the authentic you, please contact me on 0409396608 or nan@plentifullifecounselling.com.au
If you would like to learn more, I write a regular newsletter with interesting information, tips, information on courses, and the occasional freebie. At the moment I have a free mindfulness meditation for anyone who signs up to my newsletter. This meditation offers a way to safely explore your feelings and learn to be okay with them. If you would like to subscribe please click on the link here: http://eepurl.com/g8Jpiz
And don’t forget to join my Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/761908951834983