Christmas is a season full of relationships. Watch the television, read a magazine, go to the movies, look at billboards and they tell you that. Buy this for Mum. Take your family to this restaurant for Christmas lunch. Your children will love this toy. Buy this for your partner. Receive this from that special someone. Sounds wonderful.
But what if you are alone? What do you do if there is no-one to buy you something? How do you celebrate Christmas, or just survive the season, when you are on your own and you don’t want to be?
Some people plan a special day with a lovely ‘just for one’ meal. And they treat themselves to a special present.
Others volunteer to help serve lunch for Homeless People.
Others go to lunches put on by local churches that are for people who are on their own at Christmas.
Some get together with others they know.
Then there is the option of staying at home with a good book, or a movie marathon.
How the day is for you depends on how you choose for it to be.
It is not easy. If it is not your choice, being alone can be painful. Christmas and Birthdays are big reminders of something you may be able to push aside at other times of the year.
If being alone is something that still hurts, then it will be harder this year to accept and live with.
At Christmas time be kind to yourself. Acknowledge you hurt. Acknowledge that it is okay to hurt. Don’t pretend it doesn’t hurt if it does. Be kind you yourself and allow yourself to have sadness. But also allow yourself to have joy if it creeps in.
Plan something special to do at Christmas.
You may like to plan a special outfit to wear. You may put it on and tell that amazing person in the mirror they look fabulous. You may enjoy putting up a tree and decorations. You may put a present for you under the tree. Something you have wanted all year. Something special. Your treat because it is Christmas and you are special. You may choose to go somewhere that has special meaning for you. Whatever you do, make it special for you.
Talk to a counsellor if you need to. And on Christmas Day, remember Lifeline is still manned and you are not inconveniencing the operators if you call.
Remember. You may be alone at Christmas in a world that seems to leave the alone out of the picture, but there are many people out there who are alone at Christmas. You may not see them around but you are one of a group. And you are special. You matter. You are important.
In the rush of family images around Christmas, never forget how much you matter.