Surviving the Fog and Wonky Brain of Grief

Many people suffering from loss complain about finding it hard to think.

• Do you have issues with memory?

• Do you have trouble comprehending what others are telling you, or what you are reading/watching?

• Do you have trouble with you attention span, which seems to have escaped through the window and is still absent?

These areas are the biggest area of complaint by people who see me.


The reality of grief is that it is an enormous event in your life.

You are experiencing:

• Grief

• Trauma

• Sadness

• Loneliness

• And any of a limitless list of other things you may be experiencing.


Grief is a massive load for your brain to process.

Grief can take up to 99% of the energy that is available to your brain.


That is a lot of energy and a big drain on the energy you have available to you.

Thinking activities such as remembering things, comprehending things and attending to things also require a lot of energy.


But if 99% of your available energy is taken up by grief, how much is left for everything else?


From that 1% of energy you have to organise the tasks of daily living.

You may have a job you need to attend to.

You may have other family members who rely on you to get them through the day.

You have to continue to function in a world that doesn’t stop just because you are grieving.

With so little energy available to you for the normal tasks of daily living, it is no wonder you feel you are in a constant fog where you can’t even remember when you last ate and you struggle to remember what you have done in the last few hours.


So what can you do?

• A really useful tool is to write things down. Post it notes are great because you can stick them on most surfaces. You can even write on the fridge when you last ate.

• Also, don’t fight the brain fog. Accept that it is happening and will eventually pass. You may feel unproductive during this time, but you are achieving a lot. You are grieving and that is a major work in itself.

• Make sure your need to eat, drink water, sleep and move around is the most important task for you to do.

• Congratulate yourself on the things you achieve in the day. If you ate breakfast that is a great achievement. If you drank enough water you have achieved great things.


So next time you feel you are losing your mind, don’t worry, a day will come when you will have your brain back and functioning. In the meantime, be kind to yourself and remember to congratulate yourself on everything you achieve in the day, no matter how small.

If you would like to talk to me about how I can help you with your grief, please contact me on 0409396608 or

If you would like to learn more, I write a regular newsletter with interesting information, tips, information on courses, and the occasional freebie. At the moment I have a free mindfulness meditation for anyone who signs up to my newsletter. This meditation offers a way to safely explore your feelings and learn to be okay with them. If you would like to subscribe please click on the link here:

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