When life prevents you from getting on with what you think you should be doing.

We have all been there. We set out with wonderful plans to achieve an incredible amount of work. Maybe it is in our job. Maybe it is at home. Maybe it is with study. Maybe it is with family. Maybe it is with friends. There are no shortage of areas in our life where we feel we need to be achieving.

However, life frequently gets in the way and we struggle to achieve our goals. Or we are prevented completely from achieving them. So what do you do when that happens? Maybe you get angry with yourself for failing to ‘work hard enough’. Maybe you push yourself harder and feel dispirited when that fails to achieve your goals. Maybe you feel ashamed because you ‘haven’t tried hard enough’ or you have ‘let the family down’. Maybe you lost motivation. There are myriad ways you can be affected.

So what do you do about it?

Maybe you race to a counsellor to identify the blockages that are preventing you from achieving your goals.

That is not a bad idea, and if you came to me I would certainly explore that with you. But what if not being able to achieve your goals is actually the right thing to be doing now?

When I see someone struggling to achieve goals that just aren’t happening, I also look at how to cope with the ‘not now’ of goal achievement.

Not now encompasses many things.

First, it may be that the timing is wrong. You need to achieve this work at another time.

Or it may be the goals are not your goals, but are imposed by the expectations of others.

It may be impossible to achieve these goals because the life circumstances currently affecting you are too great to allow those goals to be completed.

There are many other possibilities.

So if you come to see me we will also explore the possibilities of ‘not now’ and how you can live with that and accept it.

And when the time is right for you to pursue those goals, then I can assist you to devise a plan of action to achieve them.

 

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